A Muslim Country

 A Muslim Country

There is a Muslim country run by a ruthless autocrat. That country’s leader imposes the will of a minority of religious leaders which is contrary to the will of the majority of its citizens. He has a constitution but ignores it when it gets in his way. When a law is inconvenient, he has his congress specifically exempt him from that law. He tramples on the rights of women and uses his power to enforce religious doctrine. He interprets the Koran in such a way that any books that might have contrarian points of view or which may discuss inconvenient truths are banned. He punishes anyone who might promote their use. When the scientific community has an established majority position that might interfere with profits in industries that support him, he shops around to find someone in that scientific community who is willing to agree with him.

To promote his form of government he has taken over the schools and universities to advance his ideals. Anyone who disagrees with this leader will suffer his wrath. Even major corporations that don’t wholly support his policies will be attacked with threats of taxes and special legislation designed specifically to hurt their business. He will appoint his own judges, and school boards, and will even remove elected leaders to be replaced by those who will support his beliefs.

If you have read this far and haven’t guessed which country it might be, perhaps a few more clues will help. It is home to almost 22 million people. Foreign-born individuals comprise 21 percent of the population. Now, all you must do is substitute the word Christian for Muslim, Bible for Koran, and state for the word country. Then you should be able to make a good guess. Yes, that ruthless autocrat is none other than Ron DeSantis. He runs Florida like Ayatollah Hajj Sayyid Ali Khamenei runs Iran. He is the twelfth most famous person in Florida. His notoriety is superseded by Floridians Pitbull, Ariana Grande, Jim Morrison, Tom Petty, Deion Sanders, Sidney Poitier, Debbie (Blondie) Harry, Faye Dunaway, Wesley Snipes, and Tiffany Trump. Tiffany Trump was born in Florida while Donald was born in Jamaica. I wonder if we should ask him for his birth certificate. He claims it was Jamaica “Hospital” in the Queens borough of New York City, but I haven’t seen proof.

Ron’s new slogan is, “Florida, where Woke goes to die.” Actually, it should read, “Florida, where Freedom has died.” Ron DeSantis is Florida Man, the world’s worst superhero.

Ron "Florida Man" DeSantis

In a previous musing, I wrote of a few “Florida Man” stories and have since run across many more. Things like, a Florida gun enthusiast builds a 55-foot swimming pool shaped like a revolver with a hot tub in the hammer. Then there is the 32-year-old who bit the head off his girlfriend’s pet python during a domestic dispute. The 40-year-old opened a beer during a traffic stop. There was the father in Orlando who punched a bobcat in the face for attacking his daughter’s dog. Lastly, we have the woman in New Jersey who tried to board a plane with her emotional support peacock. Yes, the woman was from New Jersey but the peacock was from Florida.

We have all heard about the governor’s attack on the Mouse House (Disney) after they disagreed with his “Don’t say gay” bill. But there is also the Tampa Bay Rays who crossed the governor when they tweeted support for gun controls after the massacre in Uvalde, Texas. He promptly vetoed state funding for a new training facility. His reasoning was that subsidizing political activism would be inappropriate. Among the many freedoms now dead in Florida is Freedom of Speech. He worries about the cost of political activism while trying to financially hurt the state’s second-largest employer, Disney World. This is in a state where its number one business is tourism. Disney had over 21 million tourists in 2019 before the pandemic. All of this financial concern from a Florida Man who paid out over $1.6 million to fly 48 immigrants, not from Florida, but from Texas to Martha’s Vineyard. Now Florida is on the hook for the legal expenses of the lawsuits resulting from that debacle.

loanDepot park (aka Miami Marlins Stadium)

Yes, Florida Man is still making headlines and hopes to be your future president. He will first have to get around Tiffany’s dad to win the nomination. If there is one thing we have learned here in Florida, Florida Man is capable of anything. How about a cage match with Trump, DeSantis, a 14-foot alligator, an 18-foot python, a Florida panther, and a lionfish. Fill the cage half with water and start the match by dropping a peacock through the roof opening of LoanDepot Park stadium. If you hadn’t heard of LoanDepot Park stadium before, join the club. It is the official name of the $634 million Miami Marlins ballpark. I thought it would be a good place to hold our cage match as the Marlins don’t do much there. I would certainly buy a ticket and it would be my first trip to the site since it was home to the Orange Bowl. I actually sold soft drinks there as a kid.

Sex Education in Florida Has Been Replaced With A Poster