First Thanksgiving; The Real Story

by Jack Dallas

Many Americans vaguely know the story of the Pilgrims, the Mayflower, Plymouth Rock, and the first Thanksgiving. Until recently, however, the true story of Thanksgiving had been hidden in a trunk once owned by a large sailmaker named McDonald. His journal tells a different story that involves the good ship Cornflower that crashed ashore further up the beach from Plymouth Rock at a place called, The Hard Rock.

The Cornflower was lost and the crew and a group of Puritans seeking religious freedom in the new land established a village near the shipwreck. Among the passengers was their preacher and his wife, Joshua and Sarah Denz. Joshua and Sarah were childless and when an abandoned Indian boy named Airjor wandered into their camp they took him in and raised him as their own son. It seems that Airjor was an outcast because he was born with only three toes on each foot.

As proper footwear for his narrow feet was unavailable, the sailmaker McDonald fashioned special shoes out of sailcloth that permitted Airjor to run and play. It turned out that Airjor could now outrun even the fastest boys and even many animals, which made him a respected hunter.

One day while out for a run and on the lookout for food, a turkey ran by and quickly passed Airjor like he was standing still. Not to be shown up by a clumsy-looking bird, Airjor pursued to catch up with the turkey. He gained on the bird just enough to see that the turkey had three legs. As he was a young boy born with three toes his curiosity was aroused even more.

Just as he was gaining on his prey, another three-legged turkey passed him by, then another. All the birds went down the path and made a turn into a part of the forest Airjor had never visited. He decided to continue his pursuit of these fast birds. About a mile down this new path Airjor came upon an Indian brave. He stopped to ask, “Did you see a group of three-legged turkeys run by here?” The Indian replied, “Yes, those are my turkeys, I raise three-legged turkeys.” When Airjor questioned why he would raise three-legged turkeys, the Indian replied, “Do you like drumsticks?” Airjor said, “Yes, of course.” “And does your father like drumsticks?” “Why, yes he does,” replied Airjor. “And maybe your mother would like a drumstick, what about her?” Airjor said, “I never thought about it that way.” “By the way, how do they taste?” The Indian replied, “I don’t know, I’ve never caught one.”

Airjor returned home without his prize turkey and stopped by the sailmaker’s house. McDonald’s wife was an excellent baker and had developed a new bread made with sesame seeds that was great for sandwiches. As McDonald was a rather large man his sandwiches were called, big macs and became part of the town’s tradition of celebrating the November harvest with a Big Mac. As sanitation was also a problem in the 1600’s, flies were prevalent, so you often ate your Big Mac with…

As a footnote to history here, you should know that Airjor went on to become famous and he made his parents, Joshua and Sarah Denz wealthy by marketing signed versions of his sailcloth shoes he called Airjor Denz, adopting his new family name.

Now you know Thanksgiving's true story and can tell all your friends. You know this story is true because you saw it on the Internet. Remember, after a good meal you can forgive anybody, even relations. In the words of my grandmother, I cook with wine and sometimes I even add it to the food. You can also try my new cocktail, Cranberry juice, potato vodka, and a bouillon cube. It tastes just like a turkey dinner. Remember to be thankful, especially if you didn't have to cook.

REFLECTIONS

Winston Churchill is credited with saying, "Americans and British are one people separated by a common language." His was a deviation of the original line from an 1887 Oscar Wilde short story, “The Canterville Ghost,” where the narrator states, “Indeed, in many respects, she was quite English, and was an excellent example of the fact that we have really everything in common with America nowadays, except, of course, language.” In either case, we could drop the Anglican reference and still have an accurate description of these “United” States. America is a nation divided by a common language.

Americans are united by geography as we are bordered by the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans. Our official national language is English. Beyond that, we are a nation of 335 million individuals with 335 million opinions on virtually everything. To function as a nation, we adopted a representative democracy as our form of government. We recently exercised our democratic freedom and held an election for president.

I voted. My candidate didn’t win. I accept that it was a fair election. While I might not like the outcome, I will accept the result and move on. I am no less proud to be an American, to have served my country in uniform, and to still get a feeling of national pride when I hear our National Anthem. My American flag hangs proudly in front of my home, no matter who our president is.

If I can be grateful for just one thing in this election it is that it was decisive and not close. We avoided the chaos that might have ensued had it been a narrow victory in either direction.

I spent the first eighteen days of October on a transatlantic cruise vacation devoid of politics. I returned to the cacophony of political news that I tried to avoid. Fearing what was to come, I immersed myself in an all-consuming outdoor project. Without going into detail just know that it involved six 55-lb bags of cement and a body now in its eighth decade of life. Body aches, sleep deprivation, mental gymnastics, and physical activity were preferred over the pain of what passes for American politics.

While I did not watch television news, the election outcome was written in the clouds and in the air. I will not participate in the postmortem. Forensic analysis of an election gone horribly wrong is an exercise in futility. I will take my exercise in a manner that might be painful but where the outcome will be a successful project. I don’t know when I will return to watching the news.

Yesterday, with 90% of my outdoor project complete, I celebrated the event with my two Nicaraguan workers who did the heavy lifting, and Sue who had helped immensely and took pictures of the process. The workmen enjoyed Toña lagers (their national beer) while I had my traditional Guinness. Two nights earlier we closed our day with shots of Flor De Caña, a pleasant Nicaraguan rum. If DT is to be my future, I would rather it be Delirium Tremens than the other thing with the same moniker.

Last evening, thoroughly exhausted, I sat in front of my television and watched Bridgerton, a mindless historical romance set in the 1800s. My Fitbit watch tells me that I went to bed at 6:48, and got 10 hours and 51 minutes of sleep. My sleep score was 81 (considered Good). I can now complete my project at my own pace.

Reflecting briefly on recent political events, I remembered a favorite poem. I will leave you with the final verses:

The sneer is gone from Casey's lip, his teeth are clenched in hate,
He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate;
And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go,
And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey's blow.

Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright,
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light;
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout,
But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.

Signs of Aging

 

While on my occasional morning walk, I took a moment to reflect on my time in the neighborhood. We moved in almost 40 years ago when everything was still under construction. We watched as they put the roof on the house we had just placed a deposit on. The streets were freshly paved, the sidewalks were new, and the landscaping was sparse. I could stand in our elevated master bedroom and look through the opening that would soon have a window to see an unobstructed view of the traffic almost four blocks away. Today, a powderpuff tree blocks most of the view of my own fence.

When we moved in I saw an older neighbor, Pepe, roller skating down the smooth streets. I soon got a pair of skates and began my own exercise routine. About a year ago I saw Pepe walking with his wife and I stopped and chatted. He was well into his 90s and had slowed down quite a bit. Several months back I heard that Pepe had passed away. His widow sold the house, they had an estate sale of furnishings, and last week the last of their belongings were placed in the swale area for trash pickup. Life in the neighborhood moves on.

While my exercise routine normally involves about a half-hour bike ride with laps around the neighborhood, I recently added an occasional walk. I wear braces to support my aging knees and took to carrying a cane to help in case one of those creaking joints decides to act up. Slowing things down allows for a bit more reflection and observation in addition to exercising different muscles.

The smooth streets have been patched and repaired over the years and the once pristine sidewalks are cracked and lifted in places by the roots of large trees. Both I and the neighborhood have aged. I had a head start on the neighborhood as I turned 40 shortly after we moved in. My house wasn’t yet one. I won’t speak for myself, but the neighborhood actually looks better and has more character.

We have beautiful trees that provide shade. The stately 70’ Royal Palms tower over the Royal Poincianas with their 60’ canopies and seasonal orange or yellow flowers. Almost without exception, the houses are well-maintained and nicely landscaped. Thirty-two years ago, Hurricane Andrew damaged things quite a bit but we built back better.

Yes, the neighborhood and I have aged but we are still chugging along. This nostalgic mood was brought on during my morning walk when I stopped briefly for a rest in the shade of a large Arborvitae. It is a favorite spot as it is at the ¾ mark on my walk and is almost always occupied by an unseen mockingbird who loudly sings out that this is his tree. This morning as I stopped the mockingbird began his song just as my Spotify playlist serendipitously switched to begin the 1963, Inez and Charlie Foxx version of Mockingbird. I wouldn’t know how to begin to calculate the odds of this happening, but it was nice to enjoy the moment. 

The Republican Story: What Will It Be?

 The Republican Story: What Will It Be?

Writers have generally accepted that there are seven story types. All narratives throughout history can be categorized into one of seven classic types. The struggle within the Republican Party to mold its narrative to gain the approval of a receptive audience continues. We can rule out Comedy and Rags to Riches even though elements of both can be found in isolated incidents. The Quest might be a contender where a protagonist and a collection of companions seek a common goal only to face temptations and obstacles. If this is to be the storyline type, would it be more Raiders of the Lost Ark or Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

No, I think we need to delve further into our classifications. Voyage and Return doesn’t fit here either as that would require learning lessons from past mistakes. Rebirth might fit as the Republican Party sought to change its ways to become a better party. If that were our story type we would certainly find that our Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol plot failed and Scrooge only became more of a scoundrel.

This leaves us with the final two categories; Tragedy and Overcoming the Monster. Now I think we are on to something. In the former, the protagonist has a major character flaw which is ultimately their undoing. Bonnie and Clyde, Hamlet, and Citizen Kane are examples of Tragedy. Certainly, honest critics could easily find parallels with the trajectory of the current Republican Party story arc. Also tied for top consideration is Overcoming the Monster. Here an evil force threatens and must be defeated to avoid disaster. Examples here include Dracula, Jaws, and any of the James Bond series.

To help the reader decide I will leave you with the latest in the quest for Republican Party identity. While our story up to now has had more villains than a Batman marathon, this one might prove to be a unique nemesis. We have already seen the Joker (Rudy), Catwomen (MTG, Lauren Bobert, Laura Loomer), The Penguin (Roger Stone), The Riddler (Steven Miller), and Two-Face (Steve Bannon). I bring you North Carolina’s Lt Governor, Mark Robinson, the Black Nazi.

Mark’s story starts off in the Rags to Riches category where he was a furniture maker who became a politician. His Batman moniker is up for grabs, but he has called himself, The Black Nazi. This was his handle on a porn website according to CNN. Trump called Robinson, “Martin Luther King on steroids.” Robinson’s thoughts on abortion are that “women should be responsible enough to keep their skirts down.” Robinson fits right in with the Republican ideology calling transgenderism and homosexuality filth and links them to pedophilia. In a recent rant, Robinson went on about a broad list of “evil-doers” and while not specific in which of these were included among his “some folks” category, he shouted, “Some folks need killing.” He went on, “It’s time for somebody to say it. It’s not a matter of vengeance. It’s not a matter of being mean or spiteful. It’s a matter of necessity!”

Robinson’s vague list included those “torturing and murdering and raping,” and “wicked people,” and socialists and communists. He has called for the arrest of trans women and has pushed antisemitic conspiracies. He described Michelle Obama as a man. He denies that Nancy Pelosi’s husband was assaulted and has opposed federal law enforcement. His violent rhetoric declares, “We are in the process of the second American Revolution, which will remain bloodless if the left allows it to be.” His insinuation is that violence would be a consideration if the MAGA forces don’t win this election.

Trump’s handlers, if there is such a thing, were preparing to distance themselves when word that “The Robinson Story” was about to break. They already knew that Robinson had quoted Adolf Hitler and taunted the Parkland school survivors, but visions of a Black Nazi wouldn’t help Trump’s attempt to call for support of the state of Israel. Get ready for the standard Trump reply to such controversy, “I barely knew the guy.”

So, will this be a Tragedy or Overcoming the Monster story for the Republican Party? Will Donald John Trump be their Charles Foster Kane whose corruption of power and personal emptiness forces them to slide into oblivion aboard a metaphorical Rosebud? Whatever story type prevails, I think it is safe to assume that Ebenezer Scrooge will not redeem himself. For me, I find that: It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World.

The Apprentice President

 The Apprentice President

I recently saw a “man on the street” reporter ask a twenty-something why he liked Trump. His simple answer was one I had heard repeated many times, “He tells it like it is.” I will forgive this young man’s naivete and blame it on his limited experience and our marginal educational system. The richest and most powerful nation in the world ranks down around 13th place among developed countries. I will also place some of the blame on a government that allowed things to get to a point where they were so screwed up that a game show host would look better than the status quo. Trump won the 2016 election with the help of our Gordian Knot presidential electoral system we call the Electoral College, He got a few things right but, like his history in business, he got a lot wrong. Now he dares to test our short-term memory with his, “Are you better off,” question.

I will also have to give credit where credit is due to the Trumpster. He follows in a long line of hucksters, con men, and religious hustlers who use the vagaries of language to spew enough nonsensical crap to fill an unabridged dictionary. Somewhere within that word salad bar, everyone can find something that sounds appealing. While Jesus spoke in parables, Trump and his “mini-me” Vance speak in a mind-numbing language of lies, half-truths, and intentional misinformation. Listen long enough and you can hear something that sounds like a solution to your problems.

Much like 12-year-old Regan (not Reagan) in The Exorcist, Trump can projectile word vomit and then speak in tongues to the delight of audiences everywhere. Unlike the movie vomit that was a mixture of corn syrup, food coloring, and cake dye, what is emitted from the oval orifice below Trump’s nose is a foul blend of hate speech, insults, lies, and promises of a life better than the last time he was at the helm of our country. Instead of “telling it like it is,” our orange-faced wannabe two-timer is pulling out the stops to do an end run on the Justice system to pardon himself and those he tricked during his kicking and screaming exit in January of 2021. He also plans to revive the cash cow that came along with his 2016 presidential term.

While Kamala Harris “wants” to be president, Donald Trump “needs” to be president. Some of his followers may like him because they think “he tells it like it is,” while others trust him because he has created the myth that he has been a wildly successful businessman. In a September 17, 2024, interview with the authors of a new book titled, "Lucky Loser: How Donald Trump Squandered His Father's Fortune And Created The Illusion Of Success," they told the story behind Trump’s mirage of riches. You can find the interview online so I won’t say any more than that Trump has failed many, many times in his shotgun “let’s see what sticks” form of business investment. His failures in his casino and real estate ventures were offset by his stint on The Apprentice and the endorsements he could tie to the successful show. The Apprentice is now gone so Trump “needs” to revive his persona as The Apprentice President.

I can understand the general frustration with our government. Our nation is complex and beyond the understanding of a single person who might be president. Therein lies the problem with the conservative Project 2025 which wants to simplify matters by putting one person in total control of everything. That might look good on paper but even a casual look will find the many pitfalls with this proposal. Even a vague knowledge of history will tell you how that has worked out for those who will be so governed.

We are a nation of individuals each with our own tinted glasses to filter what we see. Our biases can be based on personal experiences, religious beliefs, and cultural traditions. If you are looking to find acceptance of your racist/anti-Semitic/homophobic/xenophobic ideas, look no further. Somewhere within Trump’s ramblings you will find all these things mentioned, winked, nodded, or otherwise given the DJT seal of approval. If you think all abortion should be banned, Trump is with you. If you think there are many reasonable exceptions to a total ban on abortions, you will find that Trump has supported that position too. Whatever side of an argument you might be on, you can find a Trump video clip or Tweet to back your position.

Trump, The Presidential Apprentice, Season One, saw him held partly in check by advisors and experienced personnel who still had a shred of national pride and decency. If Trump, The Presidential Apprentice, The Sequel ever comes to be, just know that those guardrails have been removed. The training wheels have been removed. He will be free to treat our nation like he treats his many business ventures. If you are willing to throw our nation up against the wall to “see what sticks,” then perhaps you don’t know the man’s history like you should. If you want to vote for someone because you think they “tell it like it is,” you might want to know if they are right. Do they normally tell the truth?

UNITED States of America

 UNITED States of America

United we stand, divided we fall. A house divided against itself cannot stand. E pluribus unum, “from many, one.” These are all phrases that emphasize the importance of unity. We are the UNITED States of America. The fact, that we are a UNITED nation first and a collective of states second, seems to have escaped some people lately. One political leader in particular seems to think that it is “every man for himself, and only the strong (wealthy) survive.”

Only the Strong (wealthy) Survive

The preamble of our Constitution mentions that it was, “We the People of the United States…, that established this country. That Constitution and its Bill of Rights lay the foundation for a country united for a common purpose. It establishes our representative democracy with its system of checks and balances as the core of this union. We are a single nation that is currently made up of fifty states. We are not a collection of 27 countries that later formed an economic and political group like the European Union.

Capitalism is the second pillar necessary for the proper functioning of our democracy. It is the mandate of our government to provide the balance between the capital engine that fuels our democracy and the needs of its people. Neither can survive without the other. It is the taxing of capital that finances the needs of the people. The representative democracy of government decides the particulars of that taxation. Who gets taxed, how much they get taxed, and how those tax dollars are spent are decided by this elected government. Our problems today can all be traced back to this one function of government. It all comes down to money because money equates to power.

In the quest for money and power, some would seek to abandon our democracy so that they alone could dictate how the spoils of capitalism are managed to their personal benefit. Some envy the Viktor Orbáns of the world, or Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping as they are strongmen who keep the very wealthy rich and crush all opposition to the detriment of their people. It is they who get to decide how much they get to keep and how much they will allow to trickle down to their people to keep them functioning and working to protect their rich lifestyles.

So far, our democracy has stood the test of time. Its first serious test was our Civil War. The second most serious threat came on January 6, 2021, when a sitting president decided that he wanted to remain the “strongman” in charge by denying the results of a fair election. Today we see a continuation of that assault on democracy where that same former president seeks to regain his position of power. He does this so he might retaliate against his oppressors and finalize the abandonment of our representative democracy for one more closely aligned with Hungary, Russia, or China.

The path to his success relies on making people believe that he is working to help the working class. He will continually tell lies to make his followers numb to his deceit. He will incite fear of immigrant hoards coming to take away our jobs, rape our women, drug our children, and eat our pets, to distract them from his true purpose. He will flip-flop on his once strong position on abortion and women’s reproductive rights by still claiming to one group that he alone overturned Roe v. Wade and to others that he is the champion of women’s reproductive freedoms. You get to choose which of his conflicting positions you want to believe. Believe whatever you want, he doesn’t care as long as he wins your vote.

“the result of a consistent and total substitution of lies for factual truth is not that lies will now be accepted as truth, and the truth be defamed as lies, but that the sense by which we take our bearings in the real world — and the category of truth vs. falsehood is among the mental means to this end — is being destroyed.”  Hannah Arendt

As he has done for all previous elections, he is making claims that the upcoming election will be corrupt. If he wins, it will be the best election ever. If he loses, he told you he would be robbed by a corrupt election process. All of this is to establish motivation for another coup attempt. He has threatened violence again if he is not elected. He still refuses to accept the results of the 2020 election, except privately where he has admitted he, “lost by a whisker.” That “whisker” was 7,059,547 popular votes. That’s one big whisker. Luckily, that popular vote also translated to an electoral college win for Biden. Trump also lost the popular vote to Clinton in 2016 by 2,865,075 votes but won the electoral college because those two million plus voters didn’t live in the right states.  

A vote in Wyoming is worth 3.65 times what it is worth in California

It is not time to swallow the MAGA lie that America needs to be “Great Again” when it has always been great. It will continue to be great as long as it is UNITED. We need to protect our democracy and remain the UNITED States of America and not fall for the false promises that will lead to the strongman form of government promised by Project 2025. You know that title. Trump hasn’t heard of it, doesn’t know what it contains, and doesn’t like what it says if he had read it. It outlines what Trump’s wealthy benefactors have set forth for the elimination of checks and balances so that they can manage the faucet of capitalism to better control how much drips to feed the needs of its people.

No, this is not the time to abandon our democracy. No, it is not the time to abandon our election process. No, it is not the time to abandon our system of checks and balances. No, it is not time to create an all-powerful executive branch of government. No, it is not the time to shift the power of our government to become fifty individual states with fifty different sets of laws that no longer protect our established freedoms. It IS the time for unity and a time to protect the UNITED States of America.

Florida: Government in the Moonshine

 

Florida voters overwhelmingly approved our Government in the Sunshine Law which meant we wanted to know what was going on. For Governor DeSantis it has been a non-stop “lights out” policy. He doesn’t want citizens to know what he is doing unless it is something popular that he can campaign on.

Most recently, a state plan to commercialize nine state parks and build golf courses, 350-room hotels, pickleball courts, etc., was “outed” by a whistleblower. The public outcry was deafening. The plan was quickly shelved and DeSantis “pulled a Trump*” by stating he knew nothing about the planned bulldozing of state park habitat.

Of course, this outing of a secret plan resulted in James Gaddis being fired for “conduct unbecoming…” The fact that state law prohibits such secret plans and the secret meetings was of no concern for DeSantis. Laws are for other people. Fast-tracking environmental destruction for commercial development takes priority in the realm of Ron DeSantis.

This doesn’t mean the commercial takeover of Florida parks is off the agenda, it only means they will go “back to the drawing board.” The secretive land swap of 300 acres of state forest land to a Hernando Country golf course company doesn’t show up on the agenda for the upcoming September 12 meeting of the Acquisition and Restoration Council. That’s why they call them secrets.

A DeSantis spokesperson said state lands need to be more accessible. He went on to say this was an “exciting new initiative.” I guess electric golf carts scooting across a manicured green fairway in what used to be a forest could be seen by golfers as making the area more accessible. Golf carts don’t do well in forests.

Maybe DeSantis could take Trump’s advice and rake the forest floor to allow electric carts. The trees could be left as hazards to make the play more interesting. Add a few alligators around the tees and greens, a few wild boars, and a Florida panther or two, now you are talking excitement. The Dragon Snow Mountain Golf Club in Lijiang, China holds the record for its par 72 course. Florida could top that with a little planning.

Footnote: *Trump didn't invent the "I know nothing" dodge, Sgt. Schultz had it perfected long ago.

Footnote 2: The addition of Florida panthers might be difficult as their numbers have dwindled due to habitat loss. Hmmm?